More News

Principal Steve Raff had the sad duty Monday to explain to students at Centerville Elementary School that one of their classmates would not return this year.

Jazimen Warr, 10, attended Centerville Elementary School in Urbana for two years, and would have started fifth grade Monday.

She was killed in a hit-and-run accident early Friday morning on southbound Interstate 270 near Rockville. Michael David Eaton, 32, of Fairfax, Va., struck the family's Jeep with his Toyota Scion, killing Jazimen and the family dog. Eaton evaded capture, initially fleeing the scene of the accident on foot, before turning himself in to Maryland State Police Friday afternoon.

Raff said that the news, however, almost did not make it to him. Initially, Jazimen's family — her mother 45-year-old Angela Warr, her father, 53-year-old William J. Warr Jr., and 11-year-old Cortavia Harris, who is under the guardianship of the couple — were reported as residents of Ohio.

A spokesman for the State Police in Rockville said the family was in the process of moving when the collision occurred. He did not know details of the move, but early reports of the incident indicated the family was from Twinsburg, Ohio.

The family had been living in the area for at least two years. While Raff had seen the news of the accident, he did not recognize that the family was part of the Centerville community until a co-worker e-mailed him.

Angela Warr, was a regular and long-term substitute teacher at Centerville, though she planned to substitute teach elsewhere this year, Raff said.

Raff said beginning a typical school year is difficult, but that explaining Jazimen's death to Centerville's students made it more challenging than normal.

Grief counselors from Frederick County Public Schools' Crisis Intervention Team were at the school on Monday, Raff said. He and school counselor April Miller also specifically addressed fourth- and fifth-graders about Jazimen's death.

He said Jazimen's death stunned many students, but that a phone call sent through the school's PTA phone tree Sunday morning helped prepare students for the news.

Dealing with the paradox of excitement and loss was one of the questions Raff and the counselors addressed, he said. "It's OK to feel both ways," Raff said.

Sharon Boettinger, Frederick County's supervisor of school counselors who co-chairs the Crisis Intervention Team, said that providing a place that students and staff can go to express their grief is the main role the team plays in assisting schools that deal with tragedies like Jazimen's death.

She said the team — consisting of either she or the school system's psychological services supervisor and psychological, health and community support staff at the affected school — tries to give students and staff tools with which they work through their grief.

Sometimes, the crisis intervention team will also attend memorial services or visit with families at funeral homes, Boettinger said. "We're mainly there to support staff," she said.

However, when students attend the services without their parents, which is more common for high school students, the team is also there for them "if they can use some adult support," she said.

She said that the way in which the crisis intervention team responds varies depending upon the age of children affected and the severity of the tragedy. In some cases, when the public has already been informed of a tragedy, as was the case with Jazimen, the team does not have to spend as much time with children. However, in more severe cases the team may be called back, she said.

She said the team may only appear for a brief assembly in the morning, and then allow students to proceed with classes.

"The routine [of a class schedule] can be comforting," she said. Younger children often deal with grief differently, and Boettinger said children younger than 9 often do not understand the permanence of death. Thus, activities like drawing pictures or writing letters to the family can help them work through their grief.

Older children often need to be more involved with their grieving process, and working with them on projects like planting memory trees, establishing scholarships or creating other lasting memorials is often more helpful. "They need something more tangible," she said.

Anyone wishing to donate to donate to family's funeral costs may send checks to: The Jazimen Warr Fund, c/o Williams Worthy Legal Team, 5400 Kenilworth Ave., Riverdale, MD 20737.For information, call 301-887-9000.

Tell the child the cause of death and answer any questions the child raises. This lets the child take charge of what he or she is ready to hear.

Tell the truth. Saying "I don't know" is an OK answer to "Why?" questions.

Be a good role model. It's OK to share your sadness.

Allow children the freedom to express their grief in a way that they feel comfortable with. Laughter, tears, anger and even not reacting are all common reactions to death.

Don't underestimate a child's grief.

Don't try to protect a child from feelings of pain and loss.

Don't worry about saying the "right words."

Source: Frederick County Public Schools