Accept each other

Friday, April 7, 2006

I have one question to ask Sharron Barnum who, in her letter (‘‘Medical data shows that gay lifestyle is risky,” March 31) said that homosexual orientation is a choice.

I would like to know when and how she was given the choice of her sexual orientation, and what steps she took to choose her orientation. Was it during her childhood or later? I don’t remember my parents or anyone else sitting me down to tell me that it’s time to choose my sexual orientation. I would be most interested to hear how this process takes place in other families.

Since the word ‘‘orientation” implies an innate state, sexual or any other orientation cannot be chosen by any individual. Those rejecting their sexual orientation, for example those trying to become ‘‘ex-gay” can be compared to brown-eyed people wearing blue-tinted contact lenses and claiming that they’re blue-eyed. The reality is they still have brown eyes. And our orientations are our true selves.

I wish people would focus their energies on accepting those around them as they are, no matter their orientations. How much better our world would be if we did.

Mike Bernard, Baltimore